Finding My Voice
by Sloanage
Summary: Something's amiss in the world of pokémon, and Sterling Brown, a young boy from Pallet Town, finds himself right in the middle of it. Along the way, he'll make friends, enemies, and partners in the form of pokémon. Follow Sterling in this coming of age story as he strives to find his purpose, his mother, and his voice.


He was like a statue, his body rigid and unmoving in the shadow of Professor Oak's quaint but official-looking research center. He'd never actually been inside the building, but he often found himself staring with stars in his eyes at the acres of open land behind it, all owned by the Oaks, and all filled with pokémon he usually hadn't seen before. The professor's property stretched far off into the distance toward Viridian City, the end out of sight from the young boy's position in Pallet Town.

This was where he lived: Pallet Town. He and his father were but one of the many families that made up the small, usually quiet neighborhood in the westmost area of town, near Pallet Elementary, his school. It wasn't much to look at when compared to the bustling cities of Celadon or Cerulean, but the inhabitants here were some of the kindest in all of Kanto. In Pallet Town, life was peaceful and laid-back.

Not many families owned pokémon of their own, but at Pallet Elementary, children could study the countless professions that involved the handling or cooperation of pokémon. They learned about pokémon trainers, researchers, doctors and nurses, breeders, and more. Most towns and cities had a handful of schools like this, where children would read and write and wait to grow up and attend yet _another_ establishment of education called "college," and finally decide which path they would like to explore further. Many of these paths didn't involve pokémon at all. After all, the world needed people who were passionate about other things, such as law, art, medicine – _human_ medicine. These were decisions many young visionaries waited years into their life to make.

For Sterling, this wasn't the case.

He swallowed nervously, the laboratory looking more and more intimidating the longer he stood there, but he just could not will his legs to move. It was as if he'd been out in the sun so long, his feet had melted into the ground.

Time passed as he waited, frozen in fear and overwhelmed with anticipation, and he suddenly thought back to that night three days ago.

* * *

" _No."_

 _Sterling's father had made it very clear where he stood on the subject. Professor Oak had been there for over half an hour at this point, and while Sterling wasn't directly involved, he'd heard the entire thing from the top of the staircase in their cozy, two-story home._

" _You're holding him back from an incredible opportunity," the professor countered, his voice even and collected. Sterling had to applaud the man's patience. His father had turned down the proposition several times, but Oak was determined not to quit. "And that's not even the half of it," he continued. "I_ need _minds like his. Everything we know about science and pokémon has just been spun on its head. We have no record of the pokémon naturally found here in Kanto, and if we don't catalogue them now, we might never get the chance. We're at a crucial turning point in scientific history."_

" _I don't care." His father's responses were clear and concise. As insistent as the professor was, Sterling was sure his dad could outlast him in any standoff. "He's ten years old."_

" _Trainers have started younger. Your wife_ _－"_

" _Don't." Sterling was unsettled by the moment of halting silence that followed the single syllable. The professor didn't dare speak until the other man had finished. Sterling could hear his father take in a heavy breath, even from upstairs. When he spoke again, his voice was low and dangerous. "Don't mention my wife," he warned slowly._

 _For a moment, it sounded like Professor Oak wasn't sure what to do. Sterling cringed from his seat on the top step. He was silently praying the professor wouldn't give up. He_ craved _this opportunity to escape Pallet Town, to see what adventures were in store for him out there in the big, wide world. The big, wide,_ intimidating _world. Sure, it frightened him. Most things did. And while he wasn't exactly sure which direction he hoped to take his life one day, this could be his chance to get a pokémon of his own; to test the waters. He knew he wanted to work closely with pokémon, maybe even be like Professor Oak one day, and this sounded like the perfect way to get his foot in the door._

 _His small, young, inexperienced foot._

 _Finally, to Sterling's relief, Professor Oak collected himself and tried a different approach. "Sterling is at the top of his class," he said, and he could just imagine his father's eyes widening in surprise. "None of the other children even come close, in terms of academics. He displays the kind of knowledge and passion I would expect from any one of my lab personnel."_

" _So let him do that," his father grumbled. "Give him a job in your lab."_

 _As if he'd fallen right into the professor's trap, Oak answered smugly, "Well, that's just what I'm doing. Consider it field work."_

 _His father scoffed, and Sterling couldn't help but be slightly offended. He knew his father was a loving man. He cared a lot about Sterling and his future, but he had to give it to him, it was a lot to ask of a ten-year-old. It was hard to imagine himself leaving home behind and going...wherever it was he was supposed to be going. It sounded so grown up, so mature._

 _Finally, his father addressed the elephant in the room. "He doesn't talk."_

 _The silence that followed was long and awkward. Sterling considered retreating to his bedroom, but his curiosity far outweighed his embarrassment._

 _Everyone knew he was struggling with muteness. It was impossible_ not _to know. For four years, even he hadn't heard his own voice. He couldn't explain it, and when people said they didn't understand, he wished he could say, "I don't either," but it just wasn't that simple._

 _He couldn't explain why he didn't talk, why he couldn't just open his mouth and let the words fall out. In fact, he couldn't explain anything. He just couldn't. It was the strangest thing, and while no one usually addressed it, everyone knew it was directly related to the disappearance of his mother._

 _On the list of things the people of Pallet Town didn't dare mention, Sterling's mother was number one, rivaled only by his own muteness. She had been a household name, her most recent achievement being her fourth place victory in the Indigo League several years ago. Sterling was always her biggest fan. He came with his father to every one of her matches, and he cheered when she won and cried when she lost. Back then, he was so lively, outspoken, energetic. Now, he felt like a mere shell of himself._

 _One day shortly after the competition, his mother set out for Viridian City. She claimed she was only going to be gone for a few days, at most. Her plan was to do some high-intensity training with the gym leader there. She never returned home._

 _No one could explain her abrupt disappearance. The police searched for days, but no one had seen her. They couldn't even be sure if she'd made it to Viridian City at all. But where else could she have gone? Realistically speaking, she did own a Pidgeot; she could be anywhere. The police quickly gave up their efforts, leaving Sterling and his father to do nothing more but speculate. Why had she gone? Was it of her own consciousness, or had something happened to her?_

 _Sterling wasn't sure which one he wished was true._

 _And so, he stopped talking. It happened gradually. He mourned the loss of his mother for weeks until, like a leaking faucet, he stopped. Not just mourning, but crying, sniffling, groaning, and eventually, speaking. Everyone assumed it was a phase. He was grieving for his mother, he had shut down, exactly like his father had done for weeks. When the dust settled, he would speak again. "When the time is right," they would say._

 _That was almost five years ago. It seemed more likely that the time would never be right._

 _It was obvious why his father felt compelled to bring this up. "He doesn't talk," he repeated, this time more sternly, and Sterling was suddenly unaware of just how much time had passed. "How do you expect him to do what you want him to do_ _－_ _hell, how do you expect him to do anything? He can't. He doesn't talk."_

 _The boy felt his eyes begin to water. This happened whenever his father spoke about his muteness. He wasn't sure how he expected the man to cope, but it certainly stung whenever he caught wind of that hint of shame underneath his father's words. He'd lost his wife, after all, and it was almost like he'd lost his son, too._

 _There was another pause. Sterling could practically see Professor Oak nodding his head, steadily, empathetically, but he knew the professor wouldn't cave just because things had become uncomfortable. Quietly, almost too quiet for Sterling to catch, he said, "Is this how you want him to feel for the rest of his life?" It was an accusation, sure, but there was no trace of malice in the man's tone. He was a problem-solver, and you could hear it in every word he selected. "'He can't'? Those aren't the words I would expect you to put in your son's head, Donovan." Sterling shivered. It wasn't often he heard his father's first name. "I've seen what Sterling is capable of, in school as in life. He'll find a way, but he needs to feel supported."_

 _Sterling was crying now, silent as ever, as he waited for his father's response. It was the weirdest thing, what he was hearing downstairs. That shift in breath, that irregular sniff; his father was crying, too._

" _I know you're right, Samuel," he muttered. Sterling's heart skipped a beat. "I just can't lose him like I lost his mother."_

" _You won't."_

 _As if the two weren't sure how to end the conversation, Sterling heard only a moment of muffled movement before the front door gently clicked shut and the house was silent._

 _He darted back to his room and closed his door, hoping his father hadn't heard him. He furiously wiped the tears from his eyes and threw himself on his bed, snatching the latest copy of_ Pokémon Pals _from his nightstand, the most popular children's magazine in Kanto. He acted as if he was heavily invested in a game of_ Find Farfetch'd _as his father's heavy feet climbed the stairs and approached his room. There was a light rap of his knuckles against the wooden door, and then the man's face appeared, almost looking like he was lost. He stepped inside, obviously pretending he hadn't just been crying, but when Sterling peered over the edge of his magazine, he could see his father's eyes were still dark red._

 _He stood there, hands shoved into the deep pockets of his carpenter jeans as he carefully chose his next words._

" _How would you like to get a pokémon from Professor Oak?"_

 _The twinkle in Sterling's eyes was all the response he needed._

* * *

His eyes were watering even now as he recalled the events. It was a night he doubted he would forget for a very long time. He'd seen－well, heard－sides of both men he didn't know existed. Somehow, over the course of three days, he felt like he'd begun to understand grown-ups a little bit more than any other child in Pallet Town. He felt like _he_ was a grown-up, and while he may still be just ten years old, he knew that he had Professor Oak and now his father in his corner. He could do this.

He'd been there, ogling at the professor's lab, for twenty minutes now, oblivious to what he had looked like to the strangers who passed him by. Instilled with a newfound confidence, he finally began to take a single step forward when he was slapped on the back and lost his balance.

"Whoa, sorry!" It was a voice he knew far too well. The voice of the third brightest ten-year-old at Pallet Elementary, and the grandson of Professor Oak himself: Blue. "Didn't know you were so fragile," the fiery young boy taunted.

"Shut up, Blue," came a second voice, and Sterling whirled around to see Red, one of Pallet Town's kinder kids. "You nearly pushed him to the ground."

Blue shrugged. "Whatever. He's standing there like an idiot. _I'll_ be inside, if you two bozos would care to join me." He rubbed his hands together like he was plotting something, and Sterling felt his face heat up with embarrassment and anger. The mere presence of Blue was enough to make him feel this way. "I have a pokémon to get. Catch ya later." He darted up the hill and toward the front door of the lab, his spiked, bright auburn hair bouncing in place as he went.

Red, clearly annoyed, looked into Sterling's pale eyes. "Are you okay?" he asked. Sterling remained silent, not even offering a nod as he glared at the back of Blue's annoying head. It took a moment for Red to remember that Sterling was mute, to which he mumbled, "Oh, right."

Both boys watched as Blue reached the top of the hill, turning around and sticking his tongue out before he disappeared through the door. "What a jerk," Red growled. It was no secret that the two boys were Pallet Town's biggest rivals. Red was the second best trainer in their class, and though he would never admit it, both of them were irritated that Sterling, of all people, was considered to be more qualified to aid the professor. Up until now, he was a nobody. Fully aware of this, Sterling felt only more compelled to succeed.

"Come on," Red urged, starting toward the lab. "Blue's gonna get the best one!"

Sterling nodded in determination, chasing Red up the winding path. He would show Red. He would show Blue, too. He'd show Professor Oak, and his father, and the entire town of Pallet that he wasn't just an object that could be tossed aside and ignored. He'd show everyone.

Together, they entered the lab.

* * *

 **A/N:** Wow, it's been a minute since I've been here. Some of you may remember me from a few years ago, some of you may not. Either is great!

Just wanted to leave a quick note, seeing as this is the first chapter and all. The first thing I want to say is that you can probably expect this chapter to change. In fact, expect everything to change. The title, the names, the plot, all of it. My writing style has changed a bit over the years, and it's now super hard for me to picture the end of any plot. I wanted to get this chapter out there for you guys, and if I need to make any structural changes (including the potential addition of a prologue), I'll be sure to note it in future chapters so you can check it out.

The second thing I thought I would point out, though I think you'll be able to tell already, is that I'm taking a ton of creative liberties when it comes to creating this universe. I've taken a lot of elements from the games as well as the anime, but it wouldn't be a story of my creation if I didn't add some twists and turns. I'm letting you know this mainly to avoid the inevitable, "This is incorrect," reviews. I'm kind of a pokénut, and have been my whole life. If something looks incorrect, I probably did it on purpose.

That being said, I'm not perfect by any means. I appreciate every review I can get, whether it be about a typo, an unclear bit, or just general thoughts and opinions. I _love_ reviews, so hit that button and type away. I'm totally down to chat and might message you regarding a review, but for obvious reasons, some questions will remain unanswered until the story develops further.

I have great plans for this one, so I hope you all stick around for the ride. I can't promise updates as quick as in the past (if you know me from any of my Hunger Games fics, there was a point in time where I could bang out four chapters in a day), but I don't plan on letting this one die out, either. Thanks for reading!

Connor

(P.S. Rated T for now. I hope to use this story and series to address some serious issues, so I figured this would be the best decision for the time being. By the time things wrap up, it might not warrant the rating after all.)


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